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My new year 

Wow. So didn't expect to have this resolution, not now. I've decided to split from my husband of almost 12 years. He has changed so much since I became sick. He's become resentful of the things he has to do to pick up where I can't. He's the only income, works lots of OT just to make ends meet, keeps the house in order etc. He doesn't talk to me anymore, nor does he listen. He makes me feel like a burden and unimportant. This has been brewing for a few years now but its finally come to a head. I've given him the option of doing marriage counseling multiple times but he always threatened to walk out on the session if even 1 negative thing were said about him. He's known for holding the fact that I rely on the him over my head. He's made out of the way comments about me being lazy or pretending to be sicker than I am. He's even accused me of cheating. I found out last weekend he had installed a small surveillance camera with audio in our livingroom. The only reason he told me was bc I heard it moving. I'm in recovery and some of my phone calls need to stay private even from him, ex stepwork with my sponsor. He never would give me a straight answer as to why he hid the camera from me. That and some other reasons lead me to believe HE is the one stepping out. I plan to talk to him this Sunday and offer the option, AGAIN, of doing couple's therapy but this time I'm going to ask him to move out even if he agrees to therapy. I think we need the time apart either way.

I could use some support from anyone who has left their partner who was their sole support? How did you push through the fear of being unable to provide for yourself?

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Brittney Geerken
Brittney Geerken
Jan 13, 2020

I am so sorry to hear about this. Thank you for sharing with us. You are NOT a burden. You deserve someone that realizes that.

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Unknown member
Jan 12, 2020

That's sounds absolutely awful, I'm so sorry. I hope this new phase in your life helps you really spread your wings and we're all here to support you. Unfortunately I have no experience that could help in your situation but hopefully someone will. We're here for you

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Rachel Bernardo
Rachel Bernardo
Jan 11, 2020

I'm so sorry to hear what you are going through but it seems like you know what is best for you. I have a lot of respect for that. I hope everything works out.

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InvisibleWave
InvisibleWave
Jan 10, 2020

Wow. We are sorry to hear what you are going through. It must be extremely tough - especially when someone questions your illness. We are here to support you and hope you find support in our community.

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